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Tuesday, March 11, 2014
Friday, March 07, 2014
under the cover of wind and rain,
spring creeps into Seattle
This is kind of how I feel, hope (cling to) as I trudge beneath the heaviness that is divorce. Somewhere in me is spring, again. Somewhere in me is new life, spark, spirit, and a happy future. I'm not feeling that eager bloom today. Today I merely covet a seed under dark skies.
Sunday, March 02, 2014
There's scarcely any positive human touch in my life these days - being without a partner. I do give my son lots of hugs, high-fives, snuggles, and tickles. It's especially sweet when he gives affection back in his own way.
Saturday, March 01, 2014
As soon as Tangled ends, we put on Brave, and once Brave ends, we're back to Tangled…
Brave appeals to me a little more. At this unsteady cusp of transition in my life, something about Merida's story awakens, inspires, encourages me. Merida knows her mind and her strength. Through a challenging journey she learns compassion and humility and love. Her happily ever after remains to be written; it isn't sealed in the movie with a betrothal. I want a story like that for my next chapter.
We will run and scream
You will dance with me
We'll fulfill our dreams
And we'll be free
We will be who we are
And then heal our scars
Sadness will be far away
"… Mommy, I want to watch Merpunzel, now, please…"
Friday, February 28, 2014
There's a lovely blogger who posts "this moment" every Friday.
It's a beautiful, special moment from the week captured in a pretty photo.
My week has been a little less than lovely.
Probably the best "moment" was leaving the attorney's office, empowered with more information about how to proceed in my divorce. It's been a pretty heavy week. I'm grateful for the support of family and a few friends, yet I still feel like I'm carrying this heaviness, this divorce, on my own. I'm ready for this week to be over. I'm eager for this divorce to be done but there are more steps, more weeks of carrying the heaviness, before me.
We're heading into mediation next. Will that lessen this load? Give me a sense of sharing the burden with at least the mediator if not also with my ex? Make it our journey rather than my fatigued stumbling?
I used to know how to slow myself down and pace myself in accordance with the energy that I possessed. But not this week. My job, my son, my home requires energy, focus, and emotion I don't currently possess and all I perceive is the dissonance.
I trust that there is relief, peace, loveliness on the other side of this.
For now, in this moment, this is where I am.
Friday, February 21, 2014
Our new books have arrived and I'm very happy to explore them.
It will take some effort on my part to practice what's in the books with Little N,
but the material is there to dive into.
from the Earth Child's Handbook - a moon phases wheel
Lots of activities like mobiles, recipes for clay, paint, and treats, coloring pages, dot-to-dot, and more.
from Peaceful Piggy Meditation - "They try to be loving and kind to all beings."
A gentle story about what meditation creates in a piggy's life
and a couple of exercises to practice meditation with Little N.
from Sitting Still Like a Frog - four faces of big emotions
A good one for me to read about mindfulness
and a CD with some exercises to practice with Little N.
Now to find the nooks and crannies of time for reading and practicing together.