God is the madwoman in the attic.
I'm camped out on the threshold with my journal, camera, and plenty of snacks.

Sunday, July 05, 2009

mama moment

I've enhanced my weekend ritual in the last few weeks. Now, when the husband & baby go down for their nap, I fill a basket with mama-goodies, grab the folding chair & something to drink, & slip right outside to the yard. Our building has a skinny strip of yard behind it. Our apartment is on an end of the building & immediate to the fire door that leads out to the yard. I'm near enough that the guys can holler out the window if they really need me. Otherwise, since the yard is rarely used, solitude is mine.

This weekend's mama-basket contains: ECOlogical day planner, my journal, Beck Diet Solution, Quest for the Living God, my commonplace book, diet journal, sketch book, assorted pens, keys, Odwalla bar, and to-do/must-remember notebook. Hmmm, am I missing anything? What goes in your basket?

Here's me (in comfy new-to-me kicks from the Goodwill) in my shady spot in the yard. You can see the stairs that lead up into the building. At a slightly different angle you'd see our windows too. I settle the chair in under the holly tree, drop the basket on the ground to my right, place the beverage to my left, and prop my feet up on the tree trunk.

The holly tree houses a robin family. They aren't especially fond of my company but they haven't pooped on me yet either. Can you see their nest? (I drew a green square around it.) It's nestled in against the trunk.

I'm so grateful to have my "own place" in the yard. It's like an added room on our apartment and it's essentially my personal space. I have the benefits of proximity & privacy. Privacy is rare & precious for a family in a one-bedroom apartment. But maybe all moms (all parents? all women?) wrangle with the balance between taking care of others & stuff v. taking care of themselves. The proximity alleviates my distraction too - I'm not wondering if they woke up or need me for something or if I'm taking too much time away from them for myself.

In this open-air "room of her own" I am just me. I journal, make plans, daydream, recognize where I am toward my goals & what to do next, read, draw & color, listen to the robin family above me.... When the guys finally wake up & come get me we're all a little more rested and ready to be together.


Jeanette said...

Your ability to self-care always amazes me!

Alicia said...

I love this idea. I may have to copy you.