God is the madwoman in the attic.
I'm camped out on the threshold with my journal, camera, and plenty of snacks.

Saturday, April 27, 2013

self portrait Saturday: fasting

I've discovered two things about myself in recent weeks.  1) I actually enjoy exercise.  I've started walk/jogging during my lunch break for about 30 minutes - trying to jog more than I walk.  And I'm doing yoga in the evenings for about 30 minutes.  2) I am ADDICTED to sweets.  ADDICTED.  I binge just about daily on sweets at the office.  It's out of control.  My weight is staying the same, thank the gods, because I actually like moving my body but, yeah, not losing any weight.

So, I'm doing a cleanse starting this weekend.  A liquid fast on Saturday & Sunday, then a kind of elimination diet Mon - Fri (no wheat, no dairy etc).  I got it from Ms. G who got it from her Naturopath.  I'm going to try it.  I need to get my eating under my control - not my cravings or my emotions.  I totally eat to feel differently, especially at work (lots of drama these days).   

I really want this process to help to reset me and my relationship with food.  As it is, I'm anxious about the fast. Not so much about the physical signs of hunger but about what to do with my feelings if I don't eat them.  I eat happy, I eat anger, I eat boredom, I eat worry....  Maybe not having the option to eat them will prompt me to be more creative and productive about experiencing and expressing how I feel.  I've got the materials: journal, pens, coloring books & paper, markers & paint, my own words, my own voice.  And permission - to feel my feelings and to express myself.  

1 comment:

Bright Side of Life said...

I admit that I am battling with the whole sweet thing. I am also an addict! I am thinking of trying to replace the chocolate etc with nuts, seeds and dry fruit! *Thinking*!!