Here are some of the ways that I am learning gentleness with myself ~
light fun reading
coffee shop dates with Little N
soft comfy clothes
tea at the beach with my best friend
a couple of personal days off from work to stay and play with my family
a warm bath - Little N was so awed by this he kept bursting in to say "Mommy's bath!"
easy strolls to the library or the park on my lunch break
gentle gentle yoga and stretching
I am clumsy at this. My yoga DVD reminds me "it's not all effort" "set your foundation and open yourself to grace, it flows through you."
Little N remains my bright guide in all of this. I am learning to treat myself as an extension of him - to parent myself with the same compassion and permission that I do him. There's something about being his mother that is good gravity for me. And there's something in yielding to that that is loosing grace to flow through me, through how I tend me, and how I engage with the daily life I am living.
Right now it's still so clumsy and inconsistent - but maybe that's the best way for me to see it at all. And I am grateful to see some grace, feel some gentleness for myself.